Saturday, March 13, 2010

Our first 2 weeks as a family of 4

Well we have survived and actually enjoyed our first 2 weeks as a family of four. It was a little hectic coming home from the hospital and having a whirlwind of visitors. We then enjoyed a few days to ourselves trying to get settled in. Derick had a rough few days then has gotten better, though many days now just have rough patches mixed with the good.


I think I have cried twice for him having a hard time adjusting. The first afternoon we were home I was in Zoe's room nursing and he spotted a toy up in her closet that he wanted. I explained to him I would be happy to get it for him but he needed to wait patiently a few minutes til sister was done. A moment later he returned with his stepstool and determination to get the toy himself. I again asked him to wait just a few minutes. He looked at me with tears welled up in his eyes and said, "You are too busy doing that. (Pointing at me nursing) I will do it myself." The fact he wasn't fussing, but just more hurt... broke my heart. Thankfully with his stool he could reach what he wanted. He left the room feeling proud of himself for accomplishing his task all on his own.

Then yesterday I offered to take him to the park. He was so excited and ran to get his shoes. He sat on the stairs and asked if he was putting them on the right feet. Again as I was nursing I asked him to bring them down and I would check it out. He lost it and it turned into a 10 minute tantrum so I cancelled the park. He ran to his room and closed the door. Still attached to the baby, I went in and sat on his bed. I asked what was wrong and he just stared at us and said "I don't know." I could tell in his eyes that he was having a hard time sharing me, but didn't want to say anything bad. I teared up, hugged him and talked to him about how he was doing such a great job being a big brother and how we have to share our time.

Overall though he is doing great job. We are trying to encourage showing his love but being careful not to smother and squish her too much. I am understanding why 2nd children get to be so tough at an early age :) My mom spent the last five days with us and was a big help entertaining Derick. I appreciated having time to bond with Zoe while knowing Derick was being loved and played with as well. She left yesterday morning. Ricky returned to work yesterday as well. So we had our first day just me and the two kiddos...and we survived :)

Zoe is doing well. I think many babies are really good babies their first two weeks, as they just sleep all the time...so I don't want to jinx anything as we are just crossing that timeline. She was jaundiced but seems to be getting better although at times her eyes still look a little yellowish. She also has a little congestion and cold. I know she got it at the dr. office from her first well visit. So frustrating to see all the parents that think they are above sitting in the sick room, rather they sit in the well visit room and let their kids cough all over!! Thanks alot people.

She is so precious and we adore her. She is having more alert moments and it's fun to watch her check things out. Maybe it's having been through this once already, maybe it's that she has been so long awaited, or maybe both...but I find myself more relaxed and patient with her...even in her crying moments. At night when she has a hard time settling in I find myself wanting to hold her knowing this is such a short time of her being so little and not knowing what God has in store for us...whether or not we will experience it again with another baby. So while Ricky has opted to let her settle herself, yet I often find myself holding her..cherishing the moments...hoping and praying that the sleep I get will be enough to sustain me through the day with a good attitude and patience. I thank heaven for this treasure and for all my precious family.

My friend Sarah the photographer has been over 3 times taking pictures. Hopefully will get some from her in the next couple weeks and have some more to post including some of us as a family.

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